Billy Keels  0:01  

How to reclaim your winning ways after kids. Today's episode is sponsored by Billy Keels advisory services. If you want to learn more about how to make your 99 optional, just go to makeitoptional.com. Once again, that's makeitoptional.com. How to immediately reclaim your winning ways after kids is for any high achiever who has ever felt like the loss of confidence that's happening is affecting your mindset and the the mindset, the way that you go about doing your day to day, whether that's your professional life, whether that's your personal life, because you're not alone, and if you just give me a couple minutes, brief minutes, you're going to walk away with an idea of how you can immediately reclaim your winning ways, especially after kids. Because it's one of those things that is a big shift. It is a big mover for anyone who is a high performing professional and has the wonderful joy of being able to have children, and this, I mean, I'll share my own story, because I go back to this like 2012 I just on the cusp of turning 40 years old. Very fortunately, this point, I was married, recently married that first kid, the second kid was just recently born, and all of these positive things were happening to me and happening for me in my personal life. And at the same time, you know, two young kids, young father was fortunate that my wife, at the time, was not, didn't have to work, and all of these things so positive. But at the same time, I felt like I was completely spinning, constantly, like I was like, constantly spinning, and I didn't feel like, really, if you looked on from the outside, you would thought, Wow, this dude's like, everything's happening. But I didn't feel like I was clicking on all cylinders, right? I felt like I was constantly tired. I was a bit exhausted, but I wanted to keep winning at work, because that was super important to me, like I wanted to continue to win at work, and also wanted to be known as the provider at home, right? That was the thing that I wanted everybody to know. And at the same time, I had this desire inside that I was like, I gotta be everywhere. I gotta be here at work. I gotta be at the top. I gotta be at home. I gotta make sure that I'm there for the kids. I gotta make sure that I'm there for my wife. I gotta make sure that I'm there for anybody and everybody, right, parents, aging, all of these things, and as a result, it's because I wanted to just be everywhere all the time, and without really clearly understanding what it was that I was doing, I ended up being mentally and physically exhausted. It's just one of those things that happens when you enter into a new phase of your life. I mean, I just the last episode I did, Episode 528, I just, I broke that down. I went deep into that. So if you missed it, it's very brief episode, go check it out. But I felt like I couldn't do anymore because I was constantly physically, mentally exhausted. You know, I had had this that was going on at the office. This was the family. And then I had this festering idea, because I had been thinking about building a business on the side, which was real estate. And I'd been thinking about this now for three and a half years. Talk about paralysis analysis. It's a real thing, everybody, because it's even in 2012 I've been thinking about since 2008 from 2008 to 20 1008 to 2012 and I still had not even started the business. Now, I was playing a little bit online. I was showing up on on Facebook. I was kind of hiding here and there, but I hadn't actually claimed what I was actually doing. And so I say that because it was just more running, running, running, but not actually making the impact that I wanted to be able to make. So I wanted to be able to get back to that place of feeling like the beacon that I was before, that I was running at the top of my game, that I was constantly on top, like I said I talked about that previous episode, but more specifically, I want to talk to you about what happens and how you can immediately reclaim your time, your reclaim your winning ways after kids, because the first shift things start happening in maybe you go down the path of you, you you get married, or you have a life partner, whatever the case may be, but there's Just something very special and unique about what happens when your children arrive. And so as I recognize what I was going through, and recognizing wanting to be that father who was very present and was able to do things and wasn't constantly on planes, trains and automobiles, I started to realize, in order for me to have the most winning ways after kids feeling like I was had an alignment between what I wanted to do and what I was doing. I needed to figure out, well, you know what, I don't want to feel like I'm not capable anymore. I need to feel like I am capable. Capable. So what is it that I can do? Specifically? What can I do so that I can get back to my winning ways, so that I can get back to feeling like I'm in alignment and I'm able and capable of doing more than I'm doing I don't no longer feel lost, and I'm getting back into my winning ways? Well, it started like with most things I looked inward, started with me. It was about saying, How can I, even though it feels really, really uncomfortable, what is it that I can do for myself so that I can start to feel aligned, that I can start to feel up to be the best version of myself, not just for me, but for my family, for my coworkers, and I made a decision, and I, like I said, I felt very, very uncomfortable with it at the time, because it felt like I was being selfish, but I chose to stay. And this is the thing. This is how you can immediately reclaim your winning ways after kids is making a decision, and like I said, it will probably feel uncomfortable, at least it did for me, because I was putting myself because I was putting myself first. And I don't typically like to put myself first, but I had to start every day with and for me, meaning my winning my mornings was non negotiable. Every single morning that I started out, it was about, how do I make sure that I am giving myself what I need, emotionally, mentally, physically, and so my mornings were for me, non negotiable. What did that mean? It meant I woke up at 4am I started my mornings at 4am and the first three hours of the day were for me. I got into my silence. I got into my affirmations. I followed a very specific format for my miracle mornings, right the Savers, if anyone I know, you're listening, you're probably smiling. That's how I started every day. And then I went into what I could do to make sure that my business that I had been thinking about for so long that it started to crystallize, that it started to become a reality. I was tired of paralysis analysis. I needed action. I need to understand how this thing was working. What I needed to adjust to make it a reality, because I didn't want to depend 100% on my future and my family's future, on my corporate role. I just didn't see it. I wasn't feeling it. So that is the thing that it took me a while to get to, but I want you to get there sooner. And like I said, it didn't happen overnight, and it wasn't comfortable, because no longer was I thinking about what I wanted to do, which was thinking about my family first, thinking about my job first, I put myself first. I felt super uncomfortable beyond because I normally came last I got what was left over, because my family wanted to come first. Wanted to make sure that I was securing my job, because that was the paycheck that I needed. That paycheck was providing the lifestyle, the benefits, all the good stuff that I was able to provide for my family, but for the first time in my life, I decided to put me first, because I knew that when I put myself first and I showed up as the best version of myself, guess what? I benefited, of course, but my family benefited, and the job benefited, but most importantly, when I wanted to continue to show up as that interactive and and father, who was there because I had kids, the best way that I could do that was starting with me. And like I said, it didn't happen overnight. It wasn't perfect. It was messy in the beginning, but I got to a point, and this is the most important part of realizing how you can immediately reclaim your winning ways after kids is that you could realize and what I realized is that I could be better for others when I started by focusing on myself first, and that's what I want you to to go away with. And if it's not you, if it's a friend, if it's a family member, you see them struggling, share the episode, help them understand. This worked for me, and I'm very confident that this can and will work for you, and if it's not you, and you know that friend, that family member, share it with them, because it will work for them too. They will feel uncomfortable, especially if they put everybody else first. I've been there, done that so many times. Share it with them while you're doing that. Guess what I'm going to do? I'm going to be right here, and I'm going to be preparing for the next episode. So until then, go out and make it a great day. And thank you very, very much. Today's episode is sponsored by Billy Keels advisory services. If you want to learn more about how to make your 99 optional, just go to make it optional.com. Once again, that's make it optional.com. You.

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