Going Long Podcast_Episode 449_Billy Keels

Thu, Aug 22, 2024 5:02PM • 11:56

SUMMARY KEYWORDS

stress, strategies, responsibility, priorities, listening, high performer, talk, episode, dopamine, colleagues, started, recognition, office, other people's, boundaries, life, disconnect, tired, billy, control

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Today's conversation is sponsored by the Billy keels advisory program. If you want to learn more about how to make your nine to five optional, just go to Billy keels.com. Forward slash advising. Once again, that's Billy keels.com. Forward slash advising.

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Tired of stress at work,

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use these three strategies.

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The reason I say that is

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because this is one of the things that happens all the time to you. High performer, top performer, constantly going to President's Club. You're constantly getting the special projects, and you're taking all this responsibility on, and you are stressed out, and so if you're tired or stressed at work, literally, use these three strategies that I'm going to share with you. I'm going to share them towards the middle, maybe the end, but just hang on with me, because this is one of the things that

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definitely happens to you because you are a high performer. It's something that you have probably dealt with most of your life, but really, just keep taking on more and more responsibility you don't want to talk about. Hey, look, I'm maybe a little bit tired. Hey, listen, it's probably not best for me to do this, because you keep pushing through and because you're so awesome, you continue to deliver, and many times over, deliver.

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You are Mr. Misreliable. You are the go to person. And yeah, I've been the go to guy many, many times.

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And then you're doing your work plus the work of other people, because that makes you an amazing player. You're the one who gets it all done. And you know what?

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You're nice, you're smiling, you get the pats on the back, and everybody really appreciates you, because you have this also little touch of perfectionism, which means not only are you going to take on other people's jobs, you're going to do it better than they would do it themselves. So guess what? They're going to keep giving you their job to do, and your boss is going to appreciate it, or maybe not even know it, but it's just one of the things that happens. Ask me how I know.

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The thing is, you're going through all of these consistent you know, recognition, and your your colleagues are recognizing you, and you want to continue to be known as the winner, the leader, whether it's officially, unofficially. And the thing is, deep down inside, you are just

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trying to be stress free, like living a month or a quarter that is free of stress.

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But guess what? Guess who's creating the stress? I won't digress,

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and you also really, you just want to control more, more of your time. I've been there. I've done that. I remember. I just want, like, even helping doing things with other people. I just wanted to be able to have a little bit of extra time for myself. I wanted to be invest I wanted to be able to invest time with loved ones, and but I kept saying yes to everything. And so the more that I said yes, the more I got that recognition, the more I got that dopamine hit, the less time I had for myself, the less control I had over my own schedule.

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And the thing is, because I was having difficulties, and that's why I want to talk to you about because, like, if you're tired of stress at work, like, literally, keep listening, because I'm going to give you three strategies that are really going to help you out. But when you're doing all this work, you you eventually you come to a point where you're like, I can't even disconnect because you're so connected to work. You're so connected in desiring this dopamine hit, which is giving you more recognition. And it's almost like the Pavlovian dog, where you are just like, as soon as someone needs help, you're there, boom, I can help you, and it's going to create challenges for you to disconnect from work. And like, I did an entire episode on this. And so if you've not listened to episode 446, it's like, literally, I talked to the it's the truth about struggling to disconnect from work, like you need to go back and listen to that one, because it will give you even more insight. So I don't want to go deep into that, but, but this is one of the problems, is that when you can't disconnect from work, go back and check out 446, the episode, because your hands are in everything, and when your hands are in everything, that means you have less time to do the stuff that you want to be able to do. And so

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I remember this was a certain point, and then I started looking around. I was like, wow, hang on a second. There are other high achievers here that don't seem as exhausted as I do. They don't seem as tired as I do. And so I'm like, Oh my gosh, there must be a better way, right? And so as I started watching, I started observing, and then I also started realizing there's only 24 hours in a day, 168 hours in the week. How am I best using them? And that's the question I'm asking you, is like, how are you using that 168 hours a week that you have, who

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knows 56 of the hours you're probably sleeping, that's seven nights, times eight hours a night. I'm not there, but I sleep a lot less. So that's okay. My numbers change a little bit. But how are you best utilizing that? 168 hours a week? I realized people were using them better than I was because they looked much.

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More refreshed, much more energized than I did. And so the whole point is I wanted to learn from them, and so I then I sat down, and just like a students, just like perfectionists, and now I'm a recovering perfectionist, I sat down, and I kind of I wanted to put a couple of things in place. And a lot of this has to do with being able to set effective boundaries, right? And I did an entire episode on that one as well. That one's episode 424, if I'm not mistaken, talking about setting your your boundaries at the office. But if you need to go deeper, go check out episode 424, but today, because you're here, you're listening, I want to share with you three specific strategies that are going to help you be less stressed at the office at work. First and foremost, the one thing I would say to you is you have to learn how to set your boundaries effectively. But but within that is stop taking on your colleagues responsibility like a strategy is, don't take on anybody else's work

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full stop.

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Don't take on anybody else's work

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so that you can actually recognize how much additional time that you could have. So if you don't take on other people's work, you can recognize how much additional time you can have that you can invest with the people that you want when you want. It's going to be difficult, trust me, I'm going to get to that part here in

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just a second. Also,

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what are your life priorities? What are you what are the things that are most important to you and make sure that anything that you are doing

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inside or outside of the office, right? But with more of us a focus on the office. Make sure that your priorities are aligning your work priorities are aligning with your work priorities, and doing that properly, because if not, if you really want to be a family person, but you're spending the majority of your time, and just check your calendar, your chat, your calendar will tell on you. It told on me a lot, and it tells on me today, and that's the way that I'm keeping myself aligned with my priorities,

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so that you can actually get more energy, because when your priorities are aligned to the purpose inside and outside the office, then it's you're aligned with the things that are going to give you the most energy all the time. So do that,

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and then this is really, really hard. And it goes back to what I was talking about before, like episode 446, where I talked about disconnecting from work. It's really important to the third strategy is to leave your work stress at work, do not bring it home. I know it sounds easier said than done, but I was listening, I was watching a video the other day. Was really awesome. Maybe I'll do something on that. But it was like, you basically have the amount of time every day. I think it was like 1000 minutes, or whatever that you have. And so that time, every time that you utilize it, or you're using it on things that are going to bring you stress, especially when you're not at the office, like, don't use your minutes on things that are not going to bring you positive energy. So leave your work stress at work,

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because it doesn't do anything for you at home, other than cause issues. So just real quick,

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not taking on your colleagues responsibilities, making sure that you're aligning your priorities properly with your work, and then leave your work stress at work. Like those three simple strategies,

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it will start to help you feel less stressed. Each one of them. I've used them. I use them, and they help me a lot, massively. And I will tell you in the beginning, you're going to feel conflicted, because it's not easy, especially if you've not been doing this

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saying no to other people. When you've been a yes person most of your life, a yes man, a yes woman, it is tough. So you've got to start to exercise like, use that muscle and say no, and when someone's asking you to take on their responsibility, hey, listen, would love to however. I've got such and such and such and such which is going to prevent me from being able to do it in the way that I'm used to doing it. So, you know, you're going to have to find another option. It's going to be weird, it's going to be weird, it's going to be awkward, and it's definitely going to be uncomfortable for you, but you've got to start to exercise the no muscle, because if not, you're going to continue to be stressed out. And you're listening to this up until now, because you don't want to be stressed out. You want to understand what the three strategies are. So just to recap, not taking on other people's responsibilities, making sure that your priorities are aligned properly with your life purpose and also on your work purpose, and also leaving your work stress at work, it's going to be uncomfortable. You're going to get there. Doesn't happen overnight. I didn't get there overnight, and I still come back to these three strategies to make sure that it keeps me with less stress at the end of.

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Day, I realized that when I started applying this, I started getting control over more of my time. I want the same thing for you. I started to be able to increase the focus on the on the outcomes, and specifically the process related to getting to the outcome. Because now it's really when I'm focused on the on the process, it helps me to get to an outcome, and then it also will improve your personal and life work balance, believe it or not, increasing the nose, aligning your purpose, and also making sure that you leave the stress where it needs to stay, work, stress at work.

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I'm trusting that this has been helpful for you. I really want to hear about how these three strategies specific tactical strategies that you can put into place today, saying no to colleagues, aligning your purpose with your priorities, and also leaving the work stress at work. How are they working for you? I want to know. Feel free to reach out to me. More importantly, if you feel like or you know someone who's stressed, and you see them being stressed consistently from work with work, they're saying yes to everything, share today's episode with them. It's going to help them, and you are the person that's helping them. I appreciate it. They're definitely going to appreciate it. And heck, get on the phone and talk to them about it, or meet with them over a cup of coffee. I'd love to know how it's working. So with that stated, I want to say I'm going to start working on the next episode. I want you to take a lot of advantage of this episode. I want you to go out. I want you to make it a great day. And I want to say thank you very, very much.

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Today's

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conversation was sponsored by the Billy keels advisory program. If you're looking to make your nine to five optional and need some help, just go to Billy keels.com forward slash advising. Once again, that's Billy keels.com forward slash advising you.

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