Unknown Speaker  0:00  If you hate looking for balance, do this for your family. Now,Unknown Speaker  0:05  today's episode is sponsored by Billy Keels advisory services. If you want to learn more about how to make your 99 optional, just go to make it optional.com. Once again, that's makeitoptional.com.Unknown Speaker  0:18  Hate looking for balance. Do this for your family now is going to be a very brief episode, super brief episode. And if you have ever struggled between your life calendar and your work calendar and you feel like you're constantly playing catch up, well what I'm going to share with you is going to unlock one of the keys so that you stop feeling like you're constantly playing catch up. It's not fair, it's not good, and I don't want you to feel that way any longer. And but part of that was also this is inspired by a conversation that I had recently with someone who was expecting or looking to join the executive edge Advisory Program, somebody that I met through LinkedIn and had direct messages with and as part of the like first strategy calls, let's call it. He started sharing with me some things aboutUnknown Speaker  1:06  feeling like he was, he was feeling very guilty because he was sacrificing a lot of family time because he was an executive. And so as we started to dive into that, so I just say, Well, you know, these are things that I've recognized because I've been through it myself. And then, as he was making the comment, like it was one of the things that just affects me constantly, right? It affects me constantly because I went through it myself, so I can emotionally understand it, and I also know what it's like to constantly be torn, which is why I wanted to stop, because I keep hearing this over and over and like I am on this mantra, or mantra or mantra, however you want to say it, because I struggled so much during corporate, because I was constantly looking for the balance, right? Everybody's talking about work life balance. And so as you start to realize, like we start going through more and more conversations, I'm asking him how he how he is going through his day. And even though he's a high ranking executive, he was talking to me about how he's working like constantly making people happy, like constantly pleasing people, which is also something I can relate to, because I yeah, just wanted to constantly make everybody else around me happy, feel good, be comfortable, and all that kind of good stuff. And at the same time as we were going through this conversation, I'm asking more, like, what are the things that you know that you're not really telling anybody, but you would like to really talk about, like, how do you believe that this, this particular program, could help you? And he just, you know, at a certain point, he's like, I just, I don't want to keep missing events. I don't want to keep missing things that are important to me. I don't want to have to be on a flight or even when I'm at home. I'm on zoom all day, all night. And so ultimately, he just doesn't want to feel guilty anymore, right? And so as we tapped into that, and we started to understand more about what was, what was motivating him, what was driving him, he shared one last thing with me that was he felt like there was this constant unspoken tension at home, right? Because he's at home, but he's not at home. When he's at home, he's on his zoom or he was talking about teams in particular, that he spends most of his day on teams, and then when he's not now, that travels back almost to normal, like he's back traveling all the time. So he's just, like, when he's home, there's just, it's just tense, it's just tense. And he says, nobody really talks about it, but hey,Unknown Speaker  3:23  this, unfortunately, is something that I hear over and over and over. But the good news is, there is a way that you can address that. And if you just give me a couple minutes, like I said, I'm gonna make this really brief, because I don't want to, I don't want to get too long into this. ButUnknown Speaker  3:39  if you're looking for balance. And you hate looking for balance. Like, literally, do this for your family. Because as we started going through it, I'm asking him questions as well. Like, tell me a little bit about your you know, what? What are you doing during the day? And this when he goes into the teams, and he talks about waking up early and he wants to get ahead, and he and he's constantly fighting through his email inbox, all the stuff that you that I hear all the time. ButUnknown Speaker  4:03  then I asked him a question about Tell me a little bit about what your calendar looks like. AndUnknown Speaker  4:08  so he starts going into the calendar. He goes into the meeting, he goes into the prep, he goes into the the Get Ready for the quarterly business review. He starts telling me about the one on ones that he has with his employees. And he starts to tell me and help me understand and show that his work calendar reflects his priorities. And so he the thing that he was doing, and he helped me understand is that, by default, work took the priority. His calendar was pretty much 99.8%Unknown Speaker  4:37  Well, if not to say 100% work related. And I get it because, but the thing is, is what you see is what you do.Unknown Speaker  4:47  And he also recognized that, like he struggles, he felt this struggle, and he feels this struggle, like to try to be balanced. But in a lot of that showed up when his kids showed up, right, father of three, and as he's going through this, I.Unknown Speaker  5:00  Just simply ask him a question, like, hey, look, are you ready to stop showing up for everything? Because he was trying to also be everywhere, do everything for everybody, and he was showing up last, and just really start living with your purpose, understanding your purpose, getting clear on your purpose. And it was almost like he'd not heard it before, right? I guess, other than reading my content on LinkedIn stuff like that, but, but anyway, this was a point about helping him to start to understand that he could live in alignment with his life and his work. And so that was the whole point. It was like, Okay, stop. You don't have to be balanced all the time. And I wish people would just stop saying it, because it's just high achievers don't live in balance. It's just let me, if I'm if I'm pissing you off, I'm pissing you off. But high achievers do not live in balance. It's not one of the things that we were gifted to be able to do. It's just that. It's just the reality, right? So, so we should either continue to try to do what everybody else is doing, which is live in balance, or accept that balance is not something that is naturally wired in us, and it's not something that has helped us to achieveUnknown Speaker  6:10  things and help to create experiences for others and things like that. So in order to figure out what you can do and what you can do for your family. Now, it's really do something very simple, and it's do this. It's begin to establish and protect your personal boundaries.Unknown Speaker  6:32  Yes, I did say that begin to establish and protect your personal boundaries like it's really crucial, and I'm not saying that it's going to be it's going to be easy, because if you haven't done this up until now, and you've wanted to be everywhere, and you've wanted to live this balanced life, and you're a high achiever, you have been struggling, I know you've been struggling. I can feel it. You know why? Because I felt it,Unknown Speaker  6:56  and I don't want you to suffer, because I just simply it's not fair. And I don't and I even though Life is not fair, this is something that you can do to bring and stop the suffering, stop the struggling, stop looking for balance. Start byUnknown Speaker  7:12  establishing and protecting your boundaries. There you go. I said it, you know what in the one of the most powerful words in the world that you can do, and you can say gracefully, elegantly is No, I said that it with the Spanish tone, no or no. Get it.Unknown Speaker  7:30  So that's the thing. And you're going to feel weird inside, especially if you haven't been doing it the whole time. This is one of the things that is going to allow you to stop struggling so much, stop looking for balance. And then once you do it once, twice, 1520, times, you'll start to get better at it, and you'll start to realize every single time that you say no, you are allowing yourself to eliminate this whole thing of balance and looking for it. Then you're starting to live in agreement and alignment. I like to call that harmony. Living in harmony, being where your feet are, because it's going to be better for you. It's going to be better for every single person that comes into contact with you, including your family, your loved ones. You know what's going to happen for you. You're going to start to realize that you're having less personal and professional stress because you're living in alignment. You are going to realize that alignment is something that can help you and also make a positive impact and benefit on others. And then you're also going to be able to be at the things that you want to be with, the people that you love and the people you want to be with, because those are the things that you are putting a priority on. And you know what? When all else fails, when all else fails, the biggest unlock and the biggest transformation that you are feeling, or you will feel for yourself, is that you will be able to be comfortable, just like I said earlier, being comfortable where your feet are, and not worrying about trying to be balanced and being somewhere where you can't beUnknown Speaker  8:56  mentally, emotionally, physically, Be Where Your Feet are. It helps with alignment, and you'll stop looking for balance, because, once again, for high achievers,Unknown Speaker  9:06  spoiler alert, it's hard. It All. It doesn't exist. Let's just say it doesn't exist. For high achievers, work life. Balance doesn't exist. Look for life work harmony,Unknown Speaker  9:18  because that is the place when you're you are where your feet are, it's going to be great for you. Listen, if you know somebody who has struggled with this whole looking for balance, and they're looking for it, and they've gone through these different symptoms that I'm talking to you about today,Unknown Speaker  9:32  if it's not you, if it is you, hey, I ain't hard to findUnknown Speaker  9:36  you. Feel like you need some you want some support, you want some guidance. You can find me here.Unknown Speaker  9:41  And if it's not, you share today's episode with somebody who you care about. Be the person who has taken the time to to help them, to show that you care by sharing the episode. And then go from just sharing it to caring, getting on the phone with them, talking to them, going from theory to practice. And while you're doing that, guess where I'll be? I'll be right here. Yeah.Unknown Speaker  10:00  I will be preparing for the next episode. So until then, go out and make it a great day. And thank you very, very much.Unknown Speaker  10:09  Today's episode is sponsored by Billy Keels advisory services. If you want to learn more about how to make your 99 optional, just go to make it optional.com. Once again, that's makeitoptional.com.